My Only Sunshine
by DustBuster
Summary: When a young korean girl is badly wounded, her days are numbered. Hawkeye desperately tries to save her and in the process a friendship blossoms, giving Hawkeye someone to love. Is it too late for her, or will God take Hawkeye's sunshine away?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I dedicate this fic to Ashley, a girl at my school who passed away recently. She was only thirteen years old and loved to ski and horseback ride. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own MASH anymore than Klinger is an actual woman.**

The rain fell heavily flooding the compound with muddy water but Hawkeye paid no attention to it. He had work to do. He was careful to step around the wounded men as they lay scattered across the compound. Moaning they reached out for him, their eyes screaming a silent plea for help. He knew many of them had no hope, but that wouldn't stop him from trying. He worked his way through the many wounded, working fast, these men didn't have time to waste. He bent over a young soldier whose stomach was virtually missing. He was writhing in pain. Hawkeye desperately tried to pin the man down so he wouldn't aggravate his wounds further. Unfortunately the man would have none of it and thrashed violently. Slowly the man's efforts ceased and he lay still, his eyes clouded over and stared up at nothing. Hawkeye grabbed the young mans wrist and searched for a pulse in vain. Nothing, he was gone. Wearily he stood; another young man who would not make it home alive.

Suddenly, he stopped short. There lying motionless on a stretcher was a little Korean child. As he drew closer he saw that it was a young girl, probably no more than eight years old. Although unconscious her tiny features were scrunched in pain. She seemed to be bleeding heavily and when he reached her he found the reason. Her small legs were twisted in awkward directions and her blood mixed with the mud on her dress. Hawkeye nearly gagged when he saw that a chunk of flesh seemed to be missing.

"Nurse!" he called as he stooped to take the child's pulse. It was rapid and thready she needed help. Now. A new nurse who had just transferred rushed over and gasped at the sight of the girl's legs.

"Yes Doctor?"

He squinted up at her through the downpour, "I need some bandages, penicillin, and some guys over here fast. I need to get her inside." He leaned in closer to get a better look at her mutilated legs. "I need some light! I can't see anything out here!"

"Sir, there are more seriously wounded men. Shouldn't you help in surgery?" The nurse asked timidly.

Hawkeye glared up at her.

"I will help in surgery. As soon as I take care of her! Don't tell me how to do my job!"

She seemed stunned but nodded and rushed away to carry out his orders. He turned his attention back to the young girl. He cooed and caressed her trying to give her some comfort since she seemed to be in a considerable amount of pain. Blood soaked the gauze he was using to apply pressure to her legs. That nurse better hurry up.

His prayers were answered as two men arrived and lifted her stretcher.

"Keep pressure on that!" He shouted to the cocky nurse. She nodded and pressed fresh bandages on the girl's leg. They headed toward pre-op and Hawkeye left to go scrub up. This little girl needed his help, and she was his first priority.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own MASH. **

"Clamp!" Hawkeye felt the sweat drip down his face, but a sponge quickly wiped it away. "Come on! Come on! She's bleeding bad here, I can't see!" Hawkeye hunched over the young girl's leg which he was now operating on. The nurse adjusted the lamp above them. B.J. joined Hawkeye at his operating table.

"Hawk, I don't know. That artery is pretty ripped up. It's a wonder she didn't bleed to death."

Hawkeye nodded dejectedly, "I know, I know." He squeezed the clamp tighter as more blood seeped through, blocking his vision. He was careful not to damage the already ripped artery more than it already was.

B.J. leaned closer and let out a sigh. "Hawk it's not getting any better and you know it. You're going to have to amputate her leg."

Hawkeye nodded in defeat. He had known that it would have most likely ended with an amputation, but it still hurt. If only there was something more he could do. "Yeah, B.J. you're right. Nurse, hold this clamp for me."

"Why Doctor?" the nurse took the clamp in confusion.

Hawkeye stared down at the little girl. "I just can't do it. B.J. can you take over please?"

"Sure Hawk. Nurse I need a new pair of gloves over here!" B.J. shouted as he maneuvered his way around Hawkeye to hold the clamp. Hawkeye stared one last time at the young girl. He just didn't understand. This little girl should be running outside playing but she wasn't because of this pointless war. He couldn't take it anymore! Tears stung his eyes and it was all he could do to keep them contained. He needed to leave the O.R. now or he'd be crying all over the surgical equipment. Then he'd never hear the end of it from Winchester.

"Hawk! Where are you going?" B.J. would've reached out toward the distraught Hawkeye, now storming out of the operating room, but was a bit preoccupied sawing an eight year old girl's leg off.

Now outside the O.R. and away from prying eyes Hawkeye let his emotions run wild. He sat down heavily on a bench and leaned his head against the outer wall of the O.R. He reached up and pulled off his surgical cap and mask. Staring out into the rain filled compound, he wrung his cap nervously. He had seen so many things in Korea, men who looked as if they should still be in high school, some still containing baby fat. Yet this one girl tugged at his heart string more than the others. Maybe it was the fact that she was so young, and he could remember being her age and fishing and stargazing. Not having your legs blown off.

Hawkeye was brought out of his reverie as someone laid their hand on his shoulder. He sensed B.J. sit next to him.

"How'd it go." He stated, not bothering to look B.J. in the eye.

B.J. sighed. "It went fine Hawk."

Nothing more was said for awhile. Just the patter of rain against canvas was heard.

"Look Hawk," B.J. broke the silence.

Hawkeye held up his hand for B.J. to stop.

"You know what I need right now?"

"No Hawk. What?"

Hawkeye stood slowly pulling his raincoat over his head as he continued.

"I need a drink." He didn't even bother to ask if B.J. was joining him. He didn't need to. The two men headed across the compound together, the still was calling.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own MASH …..Yet.**

Hawkeye was staring intently at the little girl who now possessed only one leg. She was so small and pale lying in such a big bed. In reality the beds were quite small, but with her in one they seemed gigantic. He had been unable to sleep, which was surprising because he had consumed a lot of martinis, a new record actually. He had no idea what had drawn him here but watching the girl seemed to comfort him. She had been washed and given clean pajamas which now hung droopily off her short arms resting on her small chest. With each breath she rose gently in a soothing rhythm. She was quite cute with long black hair and soft features. If she had been awake Hawkeye was almost certain that she would have big dark curious eyes. He stayed quiet not wanting to wake her from such a peaceful slumber, a rare gift nowadays. As he continued to stare at her he realized it was a great privilege to see such innocence. He was so caught up in watching the young girl he did not notice Colonel Potter sit next to him.

"Hello son, how're you doing?"

Hawkeye jumped in surprise.

"Oh hi Colonel." He replied then turned back toward the girl. The Colonel rested his hand gently on Hawkeye's shoulder.

"I want to talk to you about what happened today in surgery, son" The Colonel was sincere; Hawkeye could tell he really wanted to help.

"I'm sorry Colonel; I just don't want to talk right now, and there is really nothing to be said."

The Colonel nodded in defeat. "I understand son, whenever you're ready."

The two then sat in silence staring at the girl.

"I wonder what her name is." The silence was interrupted with Hawkeye's question. After several moments the Colonel replied.

"I don't know? You'll have to ask her."

Hawkeye turned toward the Colonel. "I was wondering. Do you know how she was wounded?" He had been wondering for awhile now how someone so young could've been hurt so badly. The Colonel sighed.

"One of those POW's that came in with her told me. He said she was checking her family's field for mines so it would be safe for their cow."

Hawkeye stared in horror at the Colonel. How could someone risk their child's life for the protection of a cow!

"Was anyone else with her?"

Colonel Potter nodded in response to Hawkeye's question. "Yep. Her brother was checking the field with her, killed in the blast. She was lucky they got to her in time. They say her parents weren't anywhere to be seen. Lost track of them in the commotion." He chuckled slightly, "Found the cow though."

Hawkeye didn't reply. He just stared at the girl. Her brother was dead and her parents weren't anywhere to be found. He turned toward the Colonel.

"So she's all alone?"

"Well I got Radar on the horn with some people. If anyone can find her parents it'd be Radar."

Hawkeye nodded in agreement. Radar was the best. But what if he couldn't find her parents? What then?

She would be all alone. She'd have no one. Hawkeye, who had eagerly been awaiting her return to consciousness, now dreaded it. How could he tell her, a child, she had no one?


End file.
